Posted by
Andrews on Wednesday, December 23, 2009 4:01:02 PM
I wrote the original post a year ago, however, as I had some additional thoughts, I have decided to finally post it. The new thoughts will follow:
As most of my readers know, I am Jewish. Specifically, when I am being observant, I tend toward modern orthodoxy. Granted my beliefs are a bit closer to the chasidim theologically than the more Maimonides-influenced, rationalist orthodoxy that tends to underlie most modern orthodox synagogues, but I still tend to end up a member of modern orthodox congregations.
Yet, despite being modern orthodox, I have attended conservative, even reform synagogues. I have attended Christian services as well, I have even studied quite a bit of Christian theology. Mostly I did so out of historical interest, but I still have read many of the major names in theology. And, going a bit farther from my Judeo-Christian roots, I have also attended services at a Hindu temple and also was a guest at a Hindu friend's house when it was blessed. (Strangely, I have never attended a mosque, though back in the mid-90's I was present when a number of Moslem coworkers would gather for their prayers, as the room in which I worked was near the one where they would meet, and I kept odd hours.In fact, some made a joke of it, coming up when I was kneeling down to peer under a rack of computer equipment and telling me "No, Mecca is that way.")
My point being, I have attended services of many religions, a well as denominations I do not accept within my own faith. Sometimes I did so out of curiosity, sometimes because of an obligation to family or friends. However, at no time did it offend me, nor did I think that I was at risk of losing my own faith and being converted.
So, why on earth do people get so offended at displays of faith? Why is there such a push to stop people from saying "Merry Christmas" or engaging in public prayer? Even if I had no faith at all, I don't see why I would be offended by others who do. Now, this has nothing to do with public funding or use of publicly owned spaces, that is a separate question. I am talking about purely private displays, in stores, on private property, after hours in schools (which is effectively private as other secular clubs are allowed, making it odd to think that only religious groups are barred). When there is no question of government sponsorship, why do people still get so offended?
Then again, perhaps I am not the best judge. My wife, for example, is much less patient with those who try to convert her than I am. She is polite, but privately admits that it annoys her. On the other hand, I understand that Christians have an obligation to proselytize, so I don't mind, so long as they remain polite when I don't agree. There are a few who take rejection a bit too personally, but other than that, I am quite willing to listen, provided the proselytizer understands sometimes the time or place is not right.
So maybe I am exceptionally patient with other faiths, or maybe I am just out of the norm, but I still have trouble understanding how anyone is harmed by anyone expressing their religious beliefs. It isn't as if we are talking about temple prostitutes or human sacrifice. It is a simple greeting or a quiet prayer. I have no idea why either would make some people as angry as it does.
My newer thought concerns such things as prom season, homecoming, graduation and so on.
Those who get angry at "Merry Christmas" always claim to not be "anti-religion", they just get upset over being wished Merry Christmas as it's "not their holiday". However, I have never seen anyone get that upset over messages saying "Happy Prom Season" or "Good Luck at Homecoming", even if they have no children. They don't mind misdirected holiday wishes for anything but Christmas, which makes me think it definitely does have an anti-religious element.
And that is my second thought. If you have a friend whose child just graduated, do you send them a card? A gift? Wish them well? Even if your child did not yet graduate? Then why not wish Christians a Merry Christmas, even if you are not Christian? It is the same as wishing another happy birthday even if it is not your own birthday. They are happy over a religious event important to them, so you wish them well.
On the other hand, if your friend, excited over a good event, wishes you well, even if the day is unimportant to you, do you get angry? Or understand that he is happy and simply accept the well wishes in the spirit intended? If the latter, then why get so angry over wishes of Merry Christmas?
Which leads me to pretty much the same conclusion I reached last year: Maybe I am unusual, but I simply cannot see why this is such an issue.
POSTSCRIPT
To be fair to my wife, she is no more annoyed by religious solicitation than by any other solicitation. I think it is not so much the religious content as the simple imposition. Just wanted to clear that up before I gave the wrong impression.
POSTSCRIPT II
In some ways this reminds me of a chef contestant on
Top Chef who was upset because she, a lesbian, was being asked to cater a wedding. According to her it was hard to share in their joy as she couldn't get married. That sounds very similar to the attitude I described above, the inability to enjoy the fortune of others because you are not part of it. I don't get it.